Hey non-upper east siders, Dirty Cult here, your one and only source into the scandalous life of entertainment’s elite. Did the Gossip Girl series finale leave a huge void in your life? Are you having difficulty believing in love without a weekly dose of Chuck and Blair? Are you over the fact that Gossip Girl is actually a boy? If you answered yes to at least one of these questions, then fear no more. The not-so-critically acclaimed CW series is getting a Mexican reboot in the beautiful port of… Acapulco!

You read right…

The daughter of a prominent rich man (I’m guessing also a self-proclaimed producer), Pedro Torres, pitched the fabulous idea of La Chica Chismosa de Acapulco not too long ago. Daddy was like “that sounds like a wonderful way to maximize profits and spend ‘impuestos pesos’ on a production series about rich people in a country where 80% of the population lives below the poverty line.” And then he bought her a new benzo and took her ‘de shopping a Las Vegas.’ Even the Warner company thought the idea was a little crazy because since when the fuck is Acapulco fabulous? And… aren’t people, like, getting killed in Mexico over drugs and guns? And, isn’t the country, like, poor? Like shouldn’t we (and yes, I am Mexican) be spending our ‘impuestos’ on, like, education or job creation? Oh wait, yeah, this series is probably employing people. Hooray for job creators! And show creators! And thank Diosito that the government is backing this up. We need more government support to fund the arts, right?

Meet the Mexican version of all your favorite Upper-East Siders:

The first season seems to already be under production and will consists of 25 episodes. We think it might run for only three seasons long because Torres said they’d reveal who Gossip Girl is at that point, and the American version ended right at the reveal, so… Also, there will be no actual Gossip Girl blog. La “chica chismosa” is more of a ‘tuitera’ aka a girl who tweets in Spanish. I’m not even sure what network will be showing this, but I have a feeling it might be Televisa BECAUSE IT’S THE ONLY NETWORK IN THE COUNTRY. La pregunta es… veras este show? Mejor vuelvan a pasar Clase 406. Oh, and click HERE for a trailer. Yahoo TV! doesn’t like to give embed codes.

Ahi se ven perras…

 Besitos, Dirty Cult


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